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Building a Strong Marriage: How Humility Results in Unity and Safety

Marriage is a lovely journey crammed with ups and downs, joys and challenges. At the core of a robust and thriving marriage lies a virtue that usually goes unnoticed yet plays an important role in fostering unity and safety: humility.

My wife, Jennifer, and I even have discovered, through our own experiences, that humility shouldn’t be just a top quality but a necessity in constructing a robust marriage.

The Bible is crammed with scriptures on humility which have guided our relationship:

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves (Philippians 2:3).

Humility is the fear of the Lord; its wages are riches and honor and life (Proverbs 22:4).

He has shown you, O mortal, what is sweet. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to like mercy and to walk humbly along with your God (Micah 6:8).

These are only a number of of the numerous scriptures which have been a robust reminder for us to walk in humility, recognizing our need for Jesus and His love.

Let’s explore how humility results in unity and safety, drawing from our personal story and the timeless wisdom of the Word of God.

The Power of Humility in Marriage

Humility is walking in the liberty from pride. It’s a modest view of oneself, a posture of submission and sacrifice. In our marriage, we have learned that humility is a potent option to draw near to one another and to God.

It’s about recognizing our imperfections and agreeing to be humble about them with one another. Rather than only seeing their weakness or failure we will have understanding, patience, and forgiveness since that’s what we ourselves desire and know we want it just the identical.

Walking in humility puts the interest of your spouse, above your individual. It’s being willing to serve them and love them and provides and provides some more.

This ought to be no secret and no surprise, but when a spouse walks in humility, there may be more trust, love, and security in the wedding. Humility is non-negotiable.

Unity Through Humility

Unity is a lovely picture of humility in motion. A husband and wife, walking in humility, create a connection that goes beyond mere agreement or compromise.

Humility allows for more conversation, deeper understanding of your spouse, and the power to really lower yourself while raising your spouse up.

When each husband and wife do that, there may be an incredible unity that begins to form where everybody is in a pattern of putting their spouse above themselves.

In fact, unity is unattainable with humility. You cannot be reconciled to God without humbling yourself before him and you can’t have unity along with your spouse without putting some level of humility.

Safety Through Humility

There is deep safety in humility. It’s about creating an environment where each partners feel secure and valued.

Anytime I’ve known individuals with a sort of innate sense of pridefulness, who imagine they’re never improper or can do no improper, that produces a really unsafe and insecure relationship.

That pridefulness makes it nearly unattainable to share your heart with them. In marriage, we now have a possibility to create a protected and secure environment where your spouse doesn’t need to fear that your pride goes to get in the way in which of closeness and love.

In our marriage, this safety has led to a deeper connection and understanding, allowing us to grow together in love and faith. 

Humility has been a robust force in our marriage. It has diffused tensions, restored relationships, and brought light into our lives. Humility is something that lifts not only your spouse but your whole family up.

Building a robust marriage requires love and commitment, and humility is required for each. We have seen firsthand how humility results in unity and safety in our relationship.

It’s a lifelong journey that must start with you praying and asking God to humble your heart before Him and asking him to show you when and the right way to walk in a humble way along with your spouse.

Lastly, pray that God would also teach your spouse to be humble, by your example and thru His Word.

Walk humbly along with your spouse today and watch what God does in your marriage.

For further reading:

How to Pray for Your Wife: 6 Prayers Influenced by How Jesus Prayed for His Church

Christian Community: The Secret Ingredient for a Stronger Marriage

l”>How to Pray for Your Husband: 8 Specific Areas to Pray Over Your Husband

Building a Strong Foundation: 6 Divine Callings for Every Marriage

How to Make Bible Time a Family Affair

Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/interstid


Aaron and Jennifer Smith recognize the wonder and power of how God designed every marriage unique. We are obsessed with encouraging couples to set their eyes on God while boldly asking the query, “God, what can our marriage do for you?” In our books, we share personal stories of failure and victory from our own marriage while pointing to the wisdom in God’s Holy Word. We have been married for over 16 years and are currently raising five young children, and we aren’t any strangers to the enemy’s attack on marriage. We hope to equip you to be prepared, inspired, and encouraged to live boldly, chasing after God’s purposes together. Ever since we got married, we now have purposed to serve God and construct His kingdom together. We blog, write books, and host a weekly podcast urging couples to say yes to God and to be utilized by God for His extraordinary purposes.

This article originally appeared on Christianity.com. For more faith-building resources, visit

Christianity.com. Christianity.com

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